WEEK 7 NFL FIX

 

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I’m on a two week slide, but last week I feel as if everyone took a beating.  Aaron Rodgers joined JJ Watt and Odell Beckham Jr on the superstar IR. But the Packers weren’t the only team to leave gamblers disappointed as the Falcons, Broncos, Bucs, Chiefs and Pats all let me down last week with sub-par performances.  Although, the Pats just aren’t as good as we’re used to (not yet anyways) and the Steelers are just a bad match-up for the Chiefs (and while the Chiefs are a bad match-up for the Pats).   But this crazy season continued with 8 road teams winning games, while underdogs last went 10-4 last week and are 53-36-1 this season…..WTF.  But this week I promise to take note of the dogs.  Even with all that, the NFL is just messed up right now.  Mitch Trubisky threw for 112 yards, Jarred Goff threw for 120, Eli threw for 128 and Jay Cutler threw for 150 yards….AND THEY ALL WON.  In fact the NFL is so screwed up that Alex Smith is the favorite right now to win MVP…its true…look it up. 

HOME TEAMS IN CAPS 

Chiefs -3 over RAIDERS

So after reading all of those stats, you might be wondering…..WHY DIDN’T YOU TAKE THE UNDERDOG AND THE POINTS!!!! I don’t really have a great answer, but going into the game I thought the things the Chiefs did well on offence were easier to do on a short week, than the things the Raiders do.  Also Oakland was basically in shambles after losing at home to the lowly Chargers on Sunday and so I was ok with taking KC to win by more than 3.  And in a way…. I was right….and then wrong….and then right….and then wrong again….which only makes sense if you caught the end of the game

The Raiders saved their season (for now), but Marshawn Lynch put a hold on his, in this episode of “When Keeping It Real Goes Wrong”.  But the real issue here is, it allows dudes like this guy to get their “racist hot takes off”

Trust me, I’m for not here to get into the whole “thug” debate cause its not worth my time.  I’m also smart enough to know that people aren’t “all good” or “all bad”….and so how can I get mad at a pro athlete who instinctively was defending his teammate, gets ejected, goes to watch the game in the stands and then takes the subway home.

Also for those who don’t know, Chiefs DB Marcus Peters is also Marshawn Lynch’s cousin.  Marshawn decided to join in with some Raiders fans to troll his cousin on the ride home.

I know he’s rough around the edges, but how can you not love Marshawn Lynch?  Side note, if you still haven’t seen his show on Facebook you’re really missing out.

RAMS -3.5 over Cards (IN LONDON) 

I’m not buying into the Adrian Peterson love fest.  But shout out to my boy Dwayne who somehow predicted on Saturday night that AP would rush for 100 yards in his first game in Arizona.  It was a cool story for one day, but the dream season ends here as the Rams defensive front is REAL.  Carson Palmer will be under pressure all day as Los Angeles leads the league with 7 different players with multiple sacks.  Not good news for the already struggling Cards O-line, as Palmer has been hit 55 times this season to lead the NFL.  While on offence, the Rams are atop the NFL at 29.5 points per game.   They also lead the league with 28 passing plays of 20 or more yards, which is bad news for a Cardinal defense that has given up 5 passing touchdowns of at least 20 yards…which once again….leads the league.   Despite this game being in London, a win will go a long way in proving the Rams are ready for the LA spotlight….much like this guy

Of note, if you’re still getting mad at Lavar Ball….then you’re the problem.  Just sit back and laugh…or don’t watch.  But its like pro wrestling, where there’s the “babyface” and the “heel”….and Lavar is purposely playing the role of the heel.  So as long as people keep falling for it and giving him a reaction, both he and media platforms will continue to play the game.

VIKINGS -5.5 over Ravens 

The Vikings are a tough team to root for.  Back to back years they got off to great starts and have so much promise only to then be decimated by injuries.  Yet somehow, even without Cook and Diggs (Sounds like a 70’s buddy cop movie no?) they remain in the mix in the NFC North thanks to Aaron Rogers’ injury, the Bears being the Bears and the inconsistent Lions, being the inconsistent Lions.  Plus I will always bet on defense and the Vikings have held teams to under 20 points in 5 out of their 6 games this season.

Panthers -3 over BEARS 

I almost took the Bears because of this whole “take the underdog” thing, especially at home.  But then I came across the fact that Cam’s 3 worst games have been at home this season.  Now that’s super strange and I don’t have an explanation for it at all.  But if I’m wrong for taking Carolina on the road this Sunday, you will most likely be able to point to the fact the Panthers have allowed 10 touchdown passes and 0 interceptions over their last 4 games, with QB’s averaging 111 passer rating.  So Mr. Trubisky, this could be your time to shine…I’m just not willing to bet on it yet due to your 48.8 completion percentage.

COLTS +3 over Jags 

Bortles vs Brissett….I’m just gonna take the home dog and the points here….and never think about this game ever again.  But I will use this opportunity to fill some space with one of my favorite segments on TNT and maybe a glimpse into the future of Blake Bortles…..”Who He Play For”

Chuck’s excuse for his annual poor performance during #WhoHePlayFor is too much 😂

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Saints -5.5 over PACKERS 

Who is this team wearing New Orleans Saints uniforms?  Their defense has 9 takeaways over their 3 game winning streak.  They’ve also been running the ball 31 times a game over that same span.  But the real reason I’m on the Saints is, since 1992 the Packers have played 9 games without a QB not named Aaron Rodgers or Brett Favre.  So I’m sorry but Brett Hundley is going to have to show me something before I’m rooting for him on a back door cover.  Side note isn’t this a nice picture of a young Colin Kaepernick? 

No, I’m not saying the Packers should sign Colin Kaepernick….I just wanted an excuse to remind you that he will NOT BE SIGNED BY ANYONE THIS SEASON BECAUSE HE’S BEING BLACK BALLED BY NFL OWNERS.  So can we all just stop pretending already….thanks.

Jets +3 over DOLPHINS 

The Dolphins are 3-2 despite never scoring more than 20 points in a game this season.  Meanwhile the Jets are pesky.  They probably should have beaten Tom Brady and the Patriots and so how am I not gonna take the points against Jay Cutler…who has won the last 2 games while throwing for 92 and 151 yards respectively.   Plus, this Yankees run has NYC HOT right now just ask ARod 

Hmmm, this #Yankees jacket looks pretty good on @davidortiz, don't you think? #SneakAttack @fs1

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Or the hosts of the NUMBER ONE SHOW IN LATE NIGHT….and their new friend.

BILLS -3 over Bucs  

With or without Jameis I’m on the Bills in this game, especially coming off a bye week.   I could also see Jameis tweaking something again and Ryan Fitzpatrick throwing 3 picks in front of #BillsMafia for old times sake….

Titans – 5.5 over BROWNS 

Shout out to the Titans for their incredible late game cover on Monday night.  I appreciate you, I really do and because of it I’m going to ride with Tennessee again as they should be able to beat the Browns by a TD.  Side note, if you bet against the Browns ATS over the last two years you would be 17-4-1….SO WHY HAVEN’T I BEEN TAKING WHO EVER THEY’RE PLAYING AGAINST IN MY SURVIVOR POOL EACH AND EVERY WEEK?!?!?! Staying in “The Land” lets check in on America’s favorite comedic duo “LeBron & Dwyane”

NINERS +6 over Cowboys 

The Niners have played 3 straight road games, which never normally happens in the NFL.  They’ve lost 5 straight games by 3 points or less and are a CRAZY 5-1 against the spread this season.  So of course I’m taking them to keep this one close, even with them handing the keys over to rookie C. J. Beathard.  I mean he can’t be that much worse than Hoyer right?  Plus in their last 4 games the Cowboys defense has allowed 11 passing touchdowns compared to 1 interception.  While the Niners offense is tied with the Eagles for the league lead with 14 drives of at least 10 plays.  Sticking with the Bay Area, did you happen to see “Fake Klay Thompson” at the Warriors game this week?  Somehow, he was able to convince these “fans” that Klay Thompson would be walking around town pregame in his uniform…..shout out to #Merica

Fans really thought he was Klay Thompson #FakeKlay 😂😂 (via @bigdawstv)

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Bengals +6 over STEELERS 

Vontaze Burfict vs the Steelers, I mean what could go wrong here????  

The Steelers are tied for the 2nd most sacks in the NFL with 20 and their offence has put up 397 yards on average over the last 3 games.  But I just feel as if these games are always close and somehow, someway the Bengals will manage to keep it under a touchdown.

Broncos +1.5 over CHARGERS 

I saw way too much Brock Osweiler last week and so I hope Trevor Siemian is ok.  But even with Siemian, Denver’s offence is average at best.  The Broncos have lost both games in which they’ve allowed at least 21 points.  The Giants basically said, “beat us with your QB” if you’re going to win and they couldn’t do it.  The problem is, the Chargers defense isn’t the Giants defense.  Plus, look for Denver’s D to give Phillip Rivers trouble all day as they allow the second fewest yards per play in the NFL.   Another star that at one point moved to LA with the hopes of winning big was Chris Paul.  This week CP3 released a documentary about his off season decision to leave the Clippers and head to Houston….and for some reason (and trust me as a Hova stan, I’m not complaining at all) Jay Z was there….

#ShotsFired

Seahawks – 5.5 over GIANTS 

Speaking of the Giants, I still have yet to hear an explanation as to what happened on Sunday night football.  I’m willing to write it off as a fluke, because at best this season will end up as one of those classic 6-10 years.  Which as one of my friends who happens to be a Giants fan reminded me…..”its like that scene in The Wire about 40 degree days” 

Falcons +3.5 over PATRIOTS 

SUPER BOWL REMATCH!!!!! The Falcons have gone from the Super Bowl, to being super weird and could very easily be 1-4 this season.  While for the Pats, the offence isn’t the problem as they lead the NFL with 4 different players with over 20 catches and 300 yards.  But their defense is horrible, they’ve given up at least 400 total yards and at least 300 passing yards in every game this season.  But maybe the scariest stat of them all is Josh McCown threw for 354 yards against them last Sunday.  Again….Josh McCown…354 yards.  So get some Matt Ryan….GET SOME.

EAGLES -4.5 over Washington 

I think this is the best game of the week and they could be the two best teams in the NFC (don’t @ me).  I’m taking Philly because of Carson Wentz.  He showed me something last week against the Panthers on the road with a brilliant performance in prime time.  Meanwhile, Washington almost lost to my Niners….and they’ve already lost to the Eagles this season.   So in honor of Philly…..hopefully my picks are more like Joel Embiid….

and less like Megyn Kelly…

Get it……. #HappyShmoneyDancing

This Week 0-1

Last Week 6-8

Season 49-42-1

Also, if you’re into the NBA check out our new #BallOnBlast podcast

https://onblastpodcast.wordpress.com/2017/10/17/on-blast-podcast-ball-on-blast-ep-1/

#OnBlast

@Salexander

 

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YOU KILLED IT EP 36: SALTY AND SHADY

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Don’t forget you can now find our podcast on iTunes!!!! So if that works better for your eardrums click the link below to subscribe and don’t forget to #TellYoFriends

https://itunes.apple.com/ca/podcast/you-killed-it/id1292784123?mt=2

On this episode of “You Killed It” business is picking up on The Challenge: Dirty XXX and Sheldon and John could not be more excited. Sheldon talks about being afraid of heights while John cracks open Psychology Today to try and figure out what makes Camila tick.

Follow us on Twitter:
@ShelAlexander
@jchidleyhill

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ON BLAST PODCAST – BALL ON BLAST EP.1

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OnBlastPodcast.Wordpress.com for old episodes as well as video content. In this the debut episode of “Ball on Blast”, Sheldon and Andrew get you set for the upcoming NBA season #BallOnBlast

00 – The biggest moves of the off season
1:30 – Will the James Harden/Chris Paul backcourt work and are the Clippers dead?
6:13 – Eastern Conference preview and can the Sixers be a top 5 team?
17:59 – Western Conference preview and are the TWolves for real?
21:49 – Can Russ, PG and Melo be successful in OKC?
28:00 – Our Preseason pick for NBA MVP

If YouTube works better for you click the link below

Let us know what you think and follow us on twitter
@ShelAlexander and @awebster84

#UnpolishedUnapologetic
Hope you enjoy the show and don’t forget to #TellYoFriends

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WEEK 6 NFL FIX

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Week 4 was kind of sad within NFL circles.  Stars like JJ Watt and Odell Beckham Jr went down with serious injuries.  QB’s like Eli, Big Ben, Philip Rivers and Carson Palmer all look old and WASHED and the Dolphins and Jags both won games despite having QB’s that threw for less than 100 yards. Yet with all of that people continue to gamble on this league and I ask….why?  The most obvious answer…..why not?  Anyways as always, here come the picks.

HOME TEAM IN CAPS

PANTHERS -3 over Eagles

Another reminder you can find my Thursday Night Football picks each and every Thursday afternoon on my Instagram page (https://www.instagram.com/p/BaKUNFeH539/?taken-by=sheldonalexander).  I was on the Panthers because Cam had been ROLLING.  The Panthers were at home and their front 7 is a PROBLEM.  Heading into week 6, the Panthers led the league with 17 sacks and were up against an O-line missing its best player Lane Johnson.  Last season the Eagles went 2-8 when Johnson was out of the lineup.  But Thursday night changed when Luke Kuechly left the game with an apparent concussion.  The Panthers D just ins’t the same without their star linebacker, plus Carson Wentz continues to show that he’s REAL.  He took a lot of hits, made a ton of big plays and willed his team to a huge road victory.  The Eagles are now 5-1 and have to be considered the best team right now in the NFC.  Which is definitely reason to celebrate.

The Eagles were loose after their win over the Panthers. 😂😂😂 (via @realronalddarby)

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Bears +7 over RAVENS

I don’t think Chicago is as bad as you think and Trubisky is definitely an upgrade over Mike Glennon.  In fact Trubisky might be an upgrade over the elite Joe Flacco.  Did you know that Flacco has a passer rating of 71.0, which is second worst in the NFL behind DeShone Kizer?  Yup, I’ll take the points.

TEXANS – 10.5 over Browns

I was tempted to take the points, but there’s just too much junk going on with the Browns right now.  Why would you draft DeShone Kizer only to bench him by week 6?  What did you expect was going to happen this season?  It’s not like the Browns roster is filled with pro-bowlers on offence, so of course they were going to suck.  But now the game plan to turn around the season is to bench Kizer for some dude named Hogan, whose first name isn’t Hulk or Hollywood?!?!  Doesn’t make much sense does it?  Shout out to ESPN’s Cian Fayey who dug this up, but of his 142 passing attempts this year, Kizer has lost 226 yards to receiver error (dropped passes etc).  By comparison, Andy Dalton lost 169 yards over 563 attempts over the ENTIRE SEASON last year.  To further emphasize the point, Aaron Rodgers led the league last year with 875 lost yards.  Now he threw the ball about 700 times when you include the playoffs, but if Kizer threw the same number of passes and lost yards at the same rate as Rodgers, he would lose a whopping 1171 yards.  But sure…blame Kizer when his best target is the immortal Kenny Britt.  But back to Houston for a second and a shout out to the Astros for reaching the ALCS.  But just so that we’re clear, kneeling for the anthem is disrespecting the flag, but this is totally cool right?  Asking for a friend….

SAINTS -3.5 over Lions

The Saints are coming off the bye week and Drew Brees is completing 69% of his passes to go along with 8 touchdowns, 0 interceptions and a 108.3 passer rating.  Meanwhile the Lions got beat up by the Panthers front 7 and now have to face a much improved Saints D that’s allowed 13 points over their last 2 games.  It’s ok though Detroit fans, there’s still one hometown hero to believe in.  And his name is Marshall Mathers, who WENT IN on your boy, Trumpito.

Packers -3 over VIKINGS

Aaron Rodgers leads the NFL with 13 TDs, while the Packers are scoring touchdowns on nearly 80% of their red zone trips.  They still don’t have much of a running game and their defence is still just ok….but they have Aaron Rodgers…so I’ll be on the Packers most often than not when their favoured by less than a TD.

FALCONS -10.5 over Dolphins

So I really REALLY wanted to take the points here, based mostly on the hopes that Miami would turn things over to Matt Moore.  How much more Jay Cutler does one have to see before doing what’s right? Also, the Falcons are good…just not as good as last year.  Matt Ryan has 5 interceptions already this season, he didn’t throw his 5th pick until week 10 last year.  So I wanted to take the points, but I can’t do it with a team whose QB looks like his wife forced him to come out of retirement and whose offensive line coach resigned after he filmed himself doing what looks like “the cocaina” in his office, before a meeting and then sent the video to a female “entertainer” who he was supposedly “dating” but would meet up with to use as a “human platter” for said “cocaina”….but she then decided release the video to the public because of “inequalities in the system”….and oh yeah…she’s pregnant, he’s married (with kids) and says she has more videos and photos of others.  (read this if you want more info: http://www.espn.com/nfl/story/_/id/20990199/woman-posted-video-former-dolphins-coach-chris-foerster-speaks-publicly) .  This story is PEAK 2017 and would make for a pretty crazy “Football Life: Miami” episode.  But its also a reason for me to want nothing to do with the Dolphins for the rest of this season.  But speaking of football in Miami, a man that knows a lot about those two things is Michael Irvin.  My guy was pretty excited about last week’s win by “The U”

Patriots -9.5 over JETS

So the Jets and Patriots are both 3-2.  But the Jets wins have come against the Browns, Dolphins and Jags.  Meanwhile, the Pats are tied for 2nd in the NFL in “big plays” (w/ 25 plays of 20+ yards) and the Jets are tied for 4th for the most “big plays” allowed.  Also of note…one team has Tom Brady and the other doesn’t.   Another athlete who once called Boston home is Paul Pierce.  The Truth has a new job as an NBA analyst for ESPN and let’s just say not everyone is buying into his Truths….

Oh the hot takes from PP don’t end there…here’s who he thinks will win this year’s NBA Championship

Niners +11 over WASHINGTON

The Niners are doing a GREAT job of tanking.  They’ve lost 2 overtime games to remain in the hunt for that first overall pick in next year’s draft.   All they could do now to mess things up by signing Kirk Cousins to a MASSIVE contract after this season.  Then again, the Niners messed things up a while ago….

Seems like a good time to bring this up….

Crazy isn’t it? Anyways, moving on….

Rams +2.5 over JAGS

The Rams are good, they just weren’t ready for the Seahawks defense.  But they were in the game and had a chance to win at the end, but Jared Goff appears to need a bit more time baking in the oven.   The Rams had too many turnovers, but have won all 3 of their games this season when they end up even in the turnover battle.  They also lead the league in big plays, while Todd Gurley is one of two players in the NFL with at least 100 touches this season.  Which is a big deal because he’s averaging 5 yards per touch.  Did I mention the Jags allow 146.6 rushing yards per game with is 2nd most in the league?  Yup, I’m cool taking the Rams and the points.   But before we move on… I know a Jaguar is not a Cougar, but its close enough because I need a reason to fit in this video of the BYU Cougarettes dancing with their mascot.

Bucs -2 over CARDS

So the Cards added Adrian Peterson who is averaging 2.4 yards per carry over the past 2 seasons.  I guess its low risk, high reward and really what other options did they have.  Oh….other than Chris Johnson, who gave us the ever important reminder that life comes at you fast

RAIDERS -3.5 over Chargers

Derek Carr is still questionable, but I get the feeling that he’ll play.  And if he does I have no problem taking Oakland….but if not…yeeaaahh.  On the flip side did you know the now 1-4 Chargers didn’t draft Deshaun Watson because Philip Rivers didn’t want them to?!?!?! LOLOL that’s amazing, but not as good as Marshawn Lynch’s new online show.  The first episode is out on Facebook, but here’s the trailer.

Marshawn has a new show. No script tho…

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CHIEFS -3 over Steelers

How is this line only 3 points?  After calling out Antonio Brown and gassing himself up for being the leader of the team, Big Ben threw 5 picks and looked WASHED against the Jags.  Meanwhile I have to keep riding Alex Smith until proven otherwise.  The Chiefs lead the NFL in both yards per play and points per drive.  As a Niners fan, I still can’t believe how much I’m backing Alex Smith this season.  Well…at least until the playoffs….right?!?!?

BRONCOS -11.5 over Giants

The Broncos are the only NFL team ranking in the top 3 in both rushing offence and rushing defense.  On the flipside, last week the Giants lost Odell Beckham Jr, Brandon Marshall, Sterling Shepard and basically any other wide receiver that dared to step onto the field.  OBJ and Marshall are done for the year and so is Ben McAdoo, Eli Manning and thus the rest of the New York Football Giants season.  But back to our favourite New Yorkers, Desus and Mero who recently made a trip to Toronto to learn some “Toronto Slang”.  Of note, this video is a clear indicator of the “2 Toronto’s”….as some of you will have NO IDEA of what they’re talking about and I’m guessing those same people have never been to Scarborough Town Centre.  No judgement either way, just a statement of fact and what makes Toronto so special.

***TITANS -7 over Colts***

(UPDATE: 10:30 AM MONDAY MORNING)

It was finally announced that Marcus Mariota will play after this game was OTB for most of the week.  And as I stated earlier I will easily take the Titans to cover a TD at home against the Colts.  But then again….the way this week has gone so far…..ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE!!!!!

Now, I had a tough go last week but with all of the high spreads I’m feeling confident again…maybe a little too confident.  So confident in fact that I’ll offer up a money line parlay that you definitely SHOULD NOT DO.  Texans, Falcons Pats, Broncos moneyline parlay is +103.  Now if you’re feeling really frisky, add Washington and that jumps to +140.  This just seems to easy right? And we all know Vegas is in the business of giving away free money right?  Again, this is exactly why you shouldn’t gamble on football right?  Don’t say I didn’t warn you….DO NOT DO THAT 5 TEAM MONEYLINE PARLAY…..

#HappyShmoneyDancing

or at least be as happy as this dude working at a McDonald’s Drive-Thru

Life of Mcdicks 🕺🏿💃🏻 @sxpreme.k

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This Week 0-1

Last Week 6-7-1

This Season 43-34-1

#OnBlast

@ShelAlexander

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YOU KILLED IT EP 35: I’M EITHER GONNA PASS OUT OR THROW UP

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Sheldon and John sit in the You Killed It war room to break down the strategy and consequences of Veronica’s power move. Sheldon talks about how he’s still done with Camilla and John says he has a winning strategy for this week’s elimination challenge.

Also don’t forget you can now find our podcast on iTunes!!!! So if that works better for your eardrums click the link below to subscribe and don’t forget to #TellYoFriends

https://itunes.apple.com/ca/podcast/you-killed-it/id1292784123?mt=2

Follow us on Twitter:
@ShelAlexander
@jchidleyhill

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