All summer long I told myself that I would post my NFL picks this year, but I got lazy last week.  Then around last Thursday, my phone started blowing up with texts from friends asking who I liked on Sunday and it threw me for a loop.  I took that as I sign that I shouldn’t be lazy.  So I posted my pics on “The Gram” Sunday morning and now here we go again.  As always….

Jets -1 over BILLS 

Rex declared the Bills won the off season.  Their D is decimated by injuries and suspensions, but hey at least he hired his brother Rob right?  Also, can someone explain to me why they paid Tyrod Taylor $92M?  With the Cards and Pats next on the sched, Rob and Rex could very easily be 4-0 and be looking for work somewhere in North Tonawanda.

BROWNS +6 over Ravens

For those of you that believe in Karma, it might not be a good idea to get your side chicks name tattooed on your arm.  http://www.tmz.com/2016/08/17/robert-griffin-iii-i-got-my-new-chick-tatted-on-my-arm/ So please spare me the “poor RG3” talk.

Bengals +3 over STEELERS 

Steelers looked great on Monday night, I’m not sure if anyone can stop Antonio Brown (although, you should probably try to use your $75M number one cornerback  Mr. Gruden).  So why the Bengals?  Because this game has a FG win, written all over it. Plus the Bengals looked just as good in week one, so if you think they can win outright…then you always take the points.

Cowboys +3 over WASHINGTON 

Just mentioned Mr. Gruden’s decision to not let Josh Norman shadow Antonio Brown.  Will he do the same this week against Dez?  To be honest I don’t think it matters because after finishing with just one catch in week one, I expect Dez to COOK whoever he’s matched up against this week.  As I’m guessing most of Dak’s playbook will be something that reads “THROW IT UP TO DEZ”

TEXANS -2 over Chiefs 

As a Niners fan I will never rep Alex Smith.  So its tough for me to cosign Mr Smith celebrating the game winner after doing nothing for the majority of the game and really only gaining momentum after the Chargers lost their top receiver.

Dolphins +6.5 over PATRIOTS 

If not for your boy Kenny Stills, the Dolphins could have pulled off the upset of week and eliminated 75% of survivor pool participants.  Meanwhile Jimmy G did his best Tom Brady impression on the road in Arizona.  Can’t lie I wanna ride with Belichick until proven wrong, but I just can’t take Jimmy to cover a full TD spread.  Not yet anyways.  Meanwhile, lets update how the Tom Brady’s suspension is going….
Yup still winning…. #RideOrDieChick.

GIANTS -4.5 over Saints 

How is it possible the Saints D, can be this bad year after year, after year?  The Raiders marching down the field for a late TD, then going for 2 with a jump ball play to a “Sorry Ass Receiver” like Crabtree, showed a blatant disrespect to Sean Peyton’s D.  Meanwhile, Victor Cruz looked good in his return leaving Giants fans salivating at the Beckham/Cruz WR combo.  I’m trusting Eli for now, but in the back of my mind I know all too well how many times I’ve been burned by the lesser Manning during the regular season in a game he should win “EASY”

Niners +13.5 over PANTHERS 

Just a reminder I’m taking the Niners against the spread in every game this season in support of my dude Kaep.  Also, sticking to one of my favourite gambling moves to take the points every single time there’s a double digit spread.  At some point I’m going to write at length about this Kaepernick thing, but as of now…I like my job and I don’t wanna get myself in trouble.

Titans +6 over LIONS 

The Titans might be better than we think.  They lost a tough game against a pretty good Vikings D.  But in the end 6 points is way too many to ride with Matt Stafford and company.

RAMS +7 over Seahawks

Maybe its just me, but this game is the classic overreaction to week one line.  WAY TOO MANY POINTS for Seattle, especially when we have no idea what the home field advantage will be for the Rams.  Plus, the Rams can’t be as bad as they were on Monday night…can they?

Bucs +7 over CARDS 

I’m gonna ride Jameis for one more week and I don’t think the Cards are as good as they were last year.

RAIDERS -4.5 over Falcons 

VEGAS ZONE!!!! I honestly think the Raiders roll and the Falcons stink.  Although Jack Del Rio was maybe feeling himself a little too much after his call to go for two.   I mean is this where we’re at in the year 2016?  NFL coaches talking trash on twitter? #TwitterFingers

BRONCOS -6 over Colts 

I don’t think Andrew Luck makes it out alive. We should see a lot of these moves from Von Miller.

Jags +3 over CHARGERS 

The Jags showed me something going toe to toe with the Packers.  The Chargers are the Chargers playing out the string in San Diego.

Packers -2.5 over VIKINGS 

Shaun Hill had ZERO offensive TD’s last week.  BUT, the Vikings D is legit.  But for now, the uncertainty at QB forces me to ride with Mr Rodgers in a primetime game.

Eagles +3 over BEARS 

Jay Cutler…lets just say I’m gonna take the points.

Survivor Picks:

Week 1: Seahawks, Chiefs
Week 2: Panthers, Broncos



SEASON 9-6-2


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