THE WASHINGTON’S (-3.5) over Giants
Wow was I wrong here. There was a great stat about home favourites dominating the Thursday night games so far, outscoring road dogs 118-30; and so of course it was the one and only Eli Manning to mess up what many thought to be an easy Shmoney Dance to start the week. Maybe it was a karma thing and we’re just not all meant to make money off of a team with such a terrible name that most writers and broadcasters now refuse to mention it. I for the most part refer to the team as The Washington’s. But if you’re unfamiliar with what all the fuss is about, check out the amazing segment from Jon Stewart and the Daily Show above.
HOME TEAM IN CAPS
BEARS (+2) over Packers
Ok so let me get this straight, the Packers only win this season came against the Jets in a game that they really should have lost, but Rex’s homey called a timeout before Geno Smith (yes that Geno Smith) aired out an improbable game winning touchdown. The Packers did not look good against the Lions last week either, so I just don’t know why I would take them on the road in Chicago. When in doubt take the points, especially a home dog.
Lions (-1.5) over JETS
The Jets probably should have beaten Packers and they honestly had a real chance to beat the Bears on Monday night. But here’s the problem, Geno Smith just isn’t that good of an NFL QB. Rex’s D is still pretty good, but Geno just doesn’t make enough plays and that’s why the Jets lone win this season came against the Raiders. Lions roll.
RAVENS (-3) over Panthers
Guess what, it’s week 4!!! If you think that I’m ever going to bet against Steve Smith playing against his former team, then you must be crazy. I don’t even care if I’m wrong with this one, but I’m riding with this dude 1000%:
STEELERS (-7) over Bucs
Under no circumstances am I taking the Bucs to do anything but get smashed again, following their 56-14 beat down last Thursday night. Doug Martin is banged up and before you blink they could actually be 0-6 heading into their bye week.
TEXANS (-3) over Bills
Sorry, but it appears to be “Back to life, back to reality” for the Bills. What better way to squander the early season hope than to lose to their former love Ryan Fitzpatrick. Watching EJ Manuel last week must have made Buffalonians yearn for the days of “Fitz Magic”, only to realize that their fallback plan for the season rests in the hands of Kyle Orton. Yes, that is the life of a Bills fan.
Dolphins (-3.5) over Raiders (In London, England)
What better way to sell the NFL overseas than to play a game in which the losing coach could be out of a job before their plane touches back down in North America. Honestly, if I were the losing coach I would want to get fired while I’m still in London. At least that way I could stay a while, see some sights and maybe even do a mini European adventure. You know, make the trip worth it.
COLTS (-7) over Titans
Jake Locker is banged up meaning we could see Charlie Whitehurst under centre for the Titans. Last week, the Jags played the role of slump buster for Andrew Luck and the Colts. Is it possible to use a slump buster for two straight weeks? We’ve all had those kind of slumps right? Colts roll #ShmoneyDance
Jags (+13) over CHARGERS
Speaking of the Jags. They stink. They’re winless this season and have been outscored 119-44 in the process. BUT I promised myself this week that I would stick to the double digit spread rule and take the points. This is made a little bit easier knowing that Blake Bortles will start, so the Jags cover (barely) but the Chargers win outright.
Falcons (-3) over VIKINGS
Teddy Bridgewater peaked my interest last week and I probably shouldn’t over react to the Falcons Thursday night smack down. But, I’m going to do it anyways…(see this is why people shouldn’t gamble. That reasoning makes absolutely no sense, but hey at least I’m honest right?)
Eagles (+4.5) over NINERS
As I’ve been saying since the start of the season, I’m worried about my Niners. Their defence just isn’t as good as it was in years past. Without a pass rush, I don’t see how their secondary doesn’t get lit up by the Eagles offence. The Niners may keep Shady in check for a bit, but this whole second half Niners stink, but Eagles are great thing, doesn’t bode well for San Fran.
Saints (-3) over COWBOYS
I’m not fooled by wins over the Titans and Rams. In fact, if not for an Austin Davis pick 6 or a massive blown coverage on the Dez TD, Jerry’s boys should have lost to the Rams. Sorry, Cowboys but “We don’t believe you, you need more people”. Saints Roll #ShmoneyDance
Pats (-3) over CHIEFS
The Pats offence still looked out of sync against the woeful Raiders last week. But maybe with another week the Brady Bunch can regroup and get their ish together. Plus, I can’t be mad at Tom Brady for more than a week.
Happy Shmoney Dancing
Against the Spread:
THIS WEEK: 0-1
LAST WEEK: 9-7
Straight up WINNERS:
THIS WEEK: 0-1
LAST WEEK: 12-4